SARK Journal

Stop Naming Hurricanes After People

I think it's time to stop naming hurricanes after people!

I have always wondered why we name hurricanes after people, and particularly noticed it after hurricane Katrina, when I thought how difficult it must have been to have the name Katrina after the destruction that occurred.

Then I wondered again how anyone named Irene felt as that hurricane was being written about literally everywhere, and spoken about as "colossally destructive" and "devastating."

I've researched the reasons for the naming of hurricanes, and have read the most nonsensical, illogical "reasons," including that no one could remember any other naming methods. Have they really tried?

My sister-in-law Jennifer and I have come up with a brilliant new plan.

How about naming them after fish? Doesn't hurricane Lemon Shark have a good ring to it? Or hurricane Pufferfish?

This has the dual purpose of building awareness for the species of fish that's named, and the fish aren't bothered by reading about the mass destruction that their name is associated with. And we can be educated about all sorts of fish types.

If we need more names, how about food? Hurricane licorice whip sounds good. Or hurricane donut? That would perhaps reduce the obesity rate as people could associate unhealthy food with natural disasters.

My friend Valerie wasn't too concerned about all of this until I pointed out that her name is on the 2012 hurricane list- along with:

Alberto
Beryl
Chris
Debby
Ernesto
Florence
Gordon
Helene
Isaac
Joyce
Kirk
Leslie
Michael
Nadine
Oscar
Patty
Rafael
Sandy
Tony
Valerie
William

And here are the proposed plans for hurricane names from 2013-2016:

2013
Andrea, Barry, Chantal, Dorian, Erin, Fernand, Gabrielle, Humberto, Ingrid, Jerry, Karen, Lorenzo, Melissa, Nestor, Olga, Pablo, Rebekah, Sebastien, Tanya, Van Wendy

2014
Arthur, Bertha, Cristobal, Dolly, Edouard, Fay, Gonzalo, Hanna, Isaias, Josephine, Kyle, Laura, Marco, Nana, Omar, Paulette, Rene, Sally, Teddy, Vicky, Wilfred

2015
Ana, Bill, Claudette, Danny, Erika, Fred, Grace, Henri, Ida, Joaquin, Kate, Larry, Mindy, Nicholas, Odette, Peter, Rose, Sam, Teresa, Victor, Wanda

2016
Alex, Bonnie, Colin, Danielle, Earl, Fiona, Gaston, Hermine, Ian, Julia, Karl, Lisa, Matthew, Nicole, Otto, Paula, Richard, Shary, Tobias, Virginie, Walter

I think this all started for me with the invention and naming of the lazy Susan. No one consulted with me about the naming of this household space saver, and I don't appreciate the lazy reference. I found this from Wikipedia:

The term "Lazy Susan" made its first written appearance in a Vanity Fair advertisement for a "Revolving Server or Lazy Susan" in 1917, although their existence dates back to the 18th century. Prior to the use of the term 'Lazy Susan', they were referred to as dumbwaiters, a term today applied to a small elevator for transporting food.

[1] There is no clear evidence as to the origin of the Susan part of Lazy Susan.

[2] The Lazy Susan can be made from a variety of materials, commonly plastic, wood, or glass.

And clearly this issue of naming hurricanes after people has got to stop, and won't you join me in my "petition" for the new ways of naming?

Leave a comment here with your favorite fish, food, animal name, or other suggestion, and I will send a link to the naming entity with our suggestions.

And if someone else is willing to take over the lazy Susan, I'd be gratefull. Bill? Nancy? Jeff? Liz? Anyone?

Your very dear, and not lazy;-) and thankfully not yet named after a hurricane,   

Susan (aka SARK)

Flower Power of Love

My 7 year-old spiritual godchild Jonah just graduated from first grade, and I felt guided to create a symbol of how loved and supported he is.

I made a big flower with space in the center for a face, then I wrote names in the petals, of people who love him.

I also wrote: "Dear Jonah, every day, in every way, people are thinking of you and love you as you play."

Then each of us at his little party put our faces in the flower and gave him our intentions for his summer.

He just sat there, grinning, drinking in the love. Later, he used the special pen I'd given him to add more names to the petals. He said excitedly:

"Susan! I added more names and still have 7 more petals to fill with love- isn't that lucky?"

And so, I extend this flower power of love to you and to your loved ones.

The face in the center of Jonah's flower is his mom, Valerie.

Love,
Susan
aka SARK

Asking for More and More...

 

What does it mean to feel supported? How can we expand our experiences of it? We all have the opportunity to educate others in the best ways to support us. Most of us try to ask for as little as possible, and hope that someone guesses or knows what we want or need. Instead, we can specifically let others know what feels supportive to us and our particular ways.

Independence is highly valued, and "doing things for ourselves" is thought of as a virtue. Some people have learned about the value of support through illness or aging, and are able to welcome care and attention from people in new and different ways. Others "soldier on" and just do it all alone.

Most of us carry an internal scorecard in our heads and measure how much is okay to accept, or how we will repay it.

My friend Patricia had cancer and was bald from chemotherapy in her home, with the electricity turned off, before she asked for help.

This kind of behavior is more common than not- perhaps not that dramatic, but the same core issues:

"I'm not worthy." "Others need help more than me." "I don't want to be dependent."

We are meant to feel supported by our communities, our loved ones, and by ourselves. Self-support starts with you practicing receiving more. Here's a mantra to practice with: "Ask more and more, don't keep score."

See what happens if you use this. Practice asking without attachment to the answer. You'll know you're expanding your capacities if you feel slightly, or more than slightly uncomfortable.

This kind of practice will result in you receiving as much as giving, and multiply feelings of support and love in your life. Tell me about your experiences. I want to hear.

Glad During The Holidays: No Matter What!

 

 

The holidays are full of pressures to be glad even if you don't feel that way. People talk about "holiday cheer," "finding the silver lining," "looking on the bright side," all of which are fine when we feel those things, but can actually add to feelings of loneliness and depression when we don't. There is also a certain kind of "holiday tyranny" where we are encouraged to hide how we're actually feeling, for the "sake of the holidays."

We are meant to feel what we feel when we feel it, then let it go. Most people don't know how they're feeling, or that it's okay to feel it. We are not taught how to have, or hold multiple feelings simultaneously, so many people choose one and cling to it. That one feeling might be described as happy or sad, but it's not a true reflection of our complexities as humans, and results in our feelings not flowing. Instead they get stuck, or other feelings are left untended.

For example, you might feel happy to see your mom at Christmas, sad that she's physically declining, angry that your sister isn't doing more, and worried about the future. If you fixate on just one of those feelings, it will not be as productive or helpful. Instead, it would be much more effective to feel all that you feel, respond lovingly to yourself, your mother and your sister, and create good systems for your family and self-care practices too.

Practical Gladness means living in the "messy middle" of all of your feelings and finding your "glad ground" underneath. From this glad ground place, you can be aware of and hold all of your feelings, notice ways to respond instead of react, and transform what's possible to transform.

When we find our glad ground in the middle, it is possible to enjoy the holidays truly, authentically, and with grace and wisdom. Here are some practical ways you can experience more gladness this holiday season:

1. Create a new self-care plan — Think of what you need to feel good during the holidays, and provide it for yourself. Some of these things might be:

*Special foods that you know you will enjoy

*Call a friend to share how you're really feeling— not how you think you should be

*Practice ways to experience less stress, like going for a walk or attending a yoga class

*Write in a journal or book with lists of things that nourish you, and do the things.

2. Adjust and lower your expectations, or better yet — have none — Notice how your expectations bring suffering when they aren't met.  For example, if you feel ignored or overworked at holiday times, take yourself out for champagne and ignore some things you "should" be doing. Change your expectations about what you or others "should be" doing or acting like, and practice allowing how it actually IS. Focus on what's good and working

3. Educate others in the best ways to support you—Become clear about what actually feels supportive to you, and ask for others to contribute. For example, if you typically care for others and wish others would or could care for you, figure out what they could contribute to you that would be easy and fun. You might ask a friend to meet you for tea and laughter in the midst of a busy shopping or cleaning day, or sit with you while you wrap gifts or write cards

4. Experiment with new traditions and rituals for the holidays -- Do things differently. We all tend to repeat and become habituated. For example, "we always have our meal at _______." Some of my greatest holiday experiences have taken place at the movies, miniature golfing or serving food at a shelter instead of trying to participate in rituals or traditions that no longer represent who I am now.

5. Allow yourself to experience your holidays imperfectly — Revise your ideas of perfection and increase your capacity for spontaneous joy. For example, if you get tense and pressured about preparing a meal, buying gifts, sending cards, or trying to do it ALL, try:

*Doing less and feeling good about it-refuse to be a prisoner of others expectations

*Doing parts of things — fix the dessert, ask others to bring the other things

*Doing tiny amounts — consider attending a holiday party for 5- 15 minutes with no explanation about why

*Asking others to help and then don't control or manage "how they do it"

6. Practice transforming what hurts into what helps — Find the places that aren't working and speak up about them. For example, you might ask a group of people in your home to talk about different subjects like what they're loving in this moment, instead of sitting there judging how bored or dissatisfied you are feeling.

*If you're cooking and get crabby, let others know and help you!

*If you hate shopping, ask others to create experiences or adventures for each other instead of buying gifts

*If you keep complaining about the holidays, see if you can put your complaints on paper and resolve to have new experiences

*If you feel ungrateful, find someone to listen to who is facing challenges that you're not.

Being glad no matter what is NOT about feeling glad when you don't- how annoying. It's about practicing with all of your feelings and feeling glad as often as you possibly can- especially during the holidays!

Based on the book Glad No Matter What © 2010 by SARK. Printed with permission of New World Library, Novato, CA. www.newworldlibrary.com

I Had My Inner Critics Arrested and So Can YOU!

My newest book, Glad No Matter What: Transforming Loss and Change into Gift and Opportunity was just released from New World Library (I love them!).

  

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

While on the book tour in Arizona last week, I appeared on a morning TV show to talk about my new book. Soon after, my inner critics all showed up to tell me how I wasn't "good enough" and other mean things. After the show, I stopped at a grocery store and noticed a police officer just getting out of his car.

I approached and asked if he had time to hear an unusual request. He smiled and replied: "Depends on what it is!"

I explained that I was starting my book tour and had appeared on TV and was besieged by inner critics afterward, and asked if he could arrest them and take them to jail, and keep them there until after my book tour. He laughed and said: "Sure I can. I know about inner critics!"

He opened the squad car door and I escorted the critics in. He then asked what the book was about, and I told him it was about being Glad No Matter What, and that there are processes in it for utilizing our awakened wise selves, which is what I'd just done, by asking him to help with my inner critics.

He said he'd be getting the book, and wished me well. I watched the squad car drive off and felt such relief that the inner critics had a place to be while I connect with people and facilitate transformation and change.

To further inspire transformation and change, I invite you to invite you to join me in a playing one (or more!) of the games below.

1. Miracle Walk 

A "Miracle walk" is where you go out of your house or wherever you are, put your hands out, palms up and say; "Miracles, find me now." And then walk until you see or find one- or more! Be aware that miracles may be disguised or in unlikely places. Use love to recognize them. A variation is to say; "Miraculous people, find me now." 

Write or post a video or art in your blog or social media about your Miracle Walk or people, send and be entered to win a signed copy of the book and a 15 minute Scoop of SARK.

2. Transforming What Hurts Into What Helps

Share one thing in your life that's challenging or difficult, and one thing that you're glad about that challenge or difficulty. Something like this:
"I sometimes feel overwhelmed with all there is to do in my life and business, and am glad that I am healthy and able to do things" That reminds us of the "marvelous, messy middle" of feelings. I call it "Practical Gladness" This will further develop your transformational abilities.

Now you....Share your results on your blog or social media and be entered to win a signed copy of the book and a 15 minute Scoop of SARK

3. Be GLAD No Matter What -  Give Lovingly And Daringly

This does NOT mean feeling glad when you don't - how annoying. It means finding the glad parts in as many of your feelings as you can and then finding ways to help the world with your GLAD heart. Blog or post your GLAD offerings on social media. It might be large or tiny, common or uncommon. One of my GLAD heart gifts was singing Amazing Grace in the DMV office until everyone joined in! 

Write or post a video or art on your blog or social media about your GLAD heart gift and be entered to win a signed copy of the book and a 15 minute Scoop of SARK

We'll keep the games going till Fri/Dec 10 and announce the winners here by Wed/Dec 15!

Congratulations to Jennie, Joanna & Krysia! They have each won a signed copy of Glad No Matter What and a 15 minute Scoop of SARK! Thank you all for your exquisite and delightfull sharing, and game playing :-)

You can order your copy of Glad No Matter What and see free book tour events here! :-)

After you share in your blog or social media, leave your name and link below so we can enJOY and be inspired too ! 

 Your privacy is ultimately respected.

The Wonder of You and Your Creative Dreams

 

When I was 6 years old, I came home and said to my Mom:  "Mom, show and tell should be me every day!"

She gently told me that the other kids needed a chance, and I said:

"They don't want to- and they're begging me to do it!"

 

My first-grade teacher set up a system where I went to a different grade each day to do my show and tell. I loved it, and it was a big part of my creative dream to share what I was finding each day. I didn't know it was a "creative dream" in first grade, but I knew what I loved doing and what brought me joy.

 

We all know this.

 

We become conditioned to make a living instead of making a creative dream life. We can do both, if our creative dream isn't yet or ever meant to create enough money to live on.

 

When I was 10 years old, I told my Mother:

"I'm supposed to be a beacon of hope and write books for the world."

 

She told me to eat my peanut butter sandwich, and I wrote my first book that summer, and then wasn't published for 25 more years.

 

In between, from ages 14 to 26, I had hundreds of jobs after my Grandfather told me: "Do everything you can think of doing so you know what you don't want to do for the rest of your life."

 

I found out a lot about humility and service and what I didn't want to do through doing all of those jobs. I also found out a lot about what I loved doing and what brought me joy.

 

When I was 26, I started trying to live as the artist and writer that I knew I was, and couldn't figure out how to make a living, so I opted out of the money system and lived on barter and trade for 10 years. I also discovered that creative dreams don't die. They are very resilient and will wait forever.

 

Even though I attended college for 4 years, I decided that a degree was meaningless and quit before receiving one. I told people that I went to "collage," because I was collaging my creative dream life together.

 

When I was 35, I published my first book; A Creative Companion, and started my business; Camp SARK. I created the books and products I had dreamed about all of my life, and a business to support the structure. Many books and hundreds of products later, through all my business successes and mistakes, I find myself at 56, as eager and excited about my creative dreams as I was when I began- perhaps more excited.

 

One of my many mentors was Maya Angelou, and I appeared on a national TV show with her.

 

The show consisted of talking about how my creative dreams had been supported by Maya Angelou, and audience members whose creative dreams were being supported by SARK. It really showed me the value of talking about our creative dreams, sharing the processes, what worked and didn't, what wisdom we gather along the way with each other. This energy MOVES MOUNTAINS.

 

I created a book called Make Your Creative Dreams REAL, and a card game to play about this book. I've witnessed countless businesses and great ideas become real from people working with these materials.

 

In April 2010, I launched my first comprehensive online and on the phone course called Dream Boogie: Dancing from Dreaming to DOing. 

 

We gather in Dream Boogie for 8 fun and focused weeks, to discover and accelerate our creative dreams, and gain support from our creative community.

 

Some people launch businesses, others create systems for self-love and care, all experience growth of more money, love, time or revelations. We all do our transformational work. I offer "intuitive flashes" which are my quick intuitive answers to any creative dream questions.

 

I've long been an intuitive, I just haven't named it as such. The questions and answers are profound. There's a live weekly class, and a reframe of homework, called "ownwork." Each week, there's a "Boogie Book" to work from, and everyone receives copies of everything at the end of the course. There are also videos by me, and audio interviews with other "Dream DOers." There's a colorfull website to interact with everyone on, and a voluntary program of "Boogie Buddies." People can participate as much, or as little as they wish. Both styles will create growth and results.

 

I am thrilled to offer our third Dream Boogie session and witness all of the transformations, revelations and incandescent learning that takes place. Our creative dreams FLOURISH with this kind of attention and care, and the world will turn eagerly towards every creative dream in process, and help it to grow and GLOW for all to see. I invite you to experience it and the successes that will result.

Doing More Things Badly

 

 

"Do more things badly."

 

My inner perfectionist flipped out when I first heard this recommendation from one of my mentors; Rebecca Latimer, who wrote a book called You're Not Old Until You're Ninety: Best To Be Prepared, However.

 

Rebecca said to me;

"Oh SARK, when you speak to groups of people, would you please let them know that if they meditate and do it badly, it still works? And that goes for everything else too. My best recommendation to you is to do more things badly."

 

I knew from experience that my perfectionistic ways were inhibiting my joy, so I took her recommendation to heart and began consciously practicing doing more things badly, or imperfectly, or just not up to my former standards. I discovered that the more I did "badly" the happier I felt.

 

I found that my perfectionist inside was exhausted by me and my ideas about how to do things. I'd learned really well from my perfectionistic Mother how to do things "the right way," which was basically HER way, but it took me years to figure that out.

 

So that's when I began doing things like eating a chocolate cake with no silverware, lying down in line at the bank, singing Amazing Grace at the Department of Motor Vehicles, doing a TV interview with the back of my hair soaked in coconut oil from a massage the night before and singing Karaoke- without alcohol. I also experimented with tinier, more mundane things too.

 

I've learned that not only is it fun to do things badly, it's such a relief to give up so many of the "rules" I'd grown up with and then imposed on myself. I've also learned that I'm a pretty high achiever, and in some cases, an over achiever, so my dialing down from a 10 on a 1 to 10 scale, to a 5 or 6, is barely noticeable to anyone else!

 

It was noticeable to me however, so I engaged in some practices to support my new freedom.

 

1. Giving myself "primary permission" to do some things badly or imperfectly, or just differently.

I do this by experimenting and practicing, and noticing the results. For example, I'm usually very quick to do favors for people, or fulfill requests. My younger brother had asked me to find out some information for him prior to his wedding, and I simply didn't do it. When he asked for the information, and I confessed that I didn't have it and hadn't done it, he was shocked and annoyed with me. I apologized, but didn't feel guilty. We processed what had happened, and both realized that I was ALWAYS reliable and so rarely faltered, that I'd given myself no room at all to just be human. It was really fun to watch him be "the responsible one" who was getting things done for his wedding, and I got to experience the role of "someone who hadn't come through." I am now really learning to consciously give myself that primary permission first, that I'd always automatically given to other people.

 

2. Ignoring or simply not noticing what others think

I used to get so scared or worried if someone felt disappointed, annoyed or irritated with me about something I had or hadn't done. I had been a people pleaser who relied on being filled up from outside sources in order to feel good. Now that I consistently practice self-love and exquisite self-care, I fill myself up first, and allow others to experience and take responsibility for their own emotions. I don't focus on other people's reactions much at all anymore, and it's felt like such a great relief. I also practice ignoring people when I do unusual things, or I invite them to join in. I got the whole room to sing Amazing Grace with me at the DMV. Several people sat, or laid down with me in the bank line, and it was no problem at all to find people to eat cake with me, with no silverware.

 

3. Practicing self-love and exquisite self-care consistently

I practice living as a "full cup of self-love," ready to share the overflow with the world. I used to live like a half empty cup, looking for people or substances to fill me. Now that I've learned how to care for myself exquisitely, I can respond to the world, instead of reacting. In response, there is a choice, in reaction, there is very little choice. Now I choose what to respond to, and why. When I feel less than self-loving or caring, which is often every day, I engage in specific practices and processes to recenter myself. I am then able to extend so much more love to the world.

 

And of course, in all of the above, I also fail, falter, stumble, flail and flounder and do a lot of things badly, and sometimes very badly. I've discovered that being truly self-loving is a long term relationship with myself that contains EVERYthing, as every relationship does. The point is not to love myself all the time. The point is to practice loving myself as consistently as I am able, in all sorts of conditions. This means practicing loving the fat, forgetful, resistant parts too. And when I turn away from myself in aversion, to bring myself back as lovingly as I am able. And perhaps an even greater challenge, to love the successful, brilliant and soaring parts of myself. Because I sometimes feel more afraid of my joy than my pain. Pain seems easier to relate to, and joy can feel lonely.

 

My early abuse experiences taught me that pain lasts, and joy is unreliable. I've now learned to live more often in a opposite state- joy is everlasting, and pain can't always be trusted. And in between those two states, is the glorious middle spaces where most of my growth takes place. My explorations in doing more things badly have shown me that there is a lot of joy in the mess and chaos of living as a "splendidly imperfect" human bean.

Delight Yourself First

 

 

"Remember to delight yourself first, then others can be truly delighted."

 

This was my mantra when I published my first book in 1990, and still holds true. When we focus on the song of our soul and heart, then others will be touched similarly. Sometimes people wonder or worry whether people will like or approve of their creative expression. It's none of your business. It's your business to stay present and focused for the work of your deepest dreams. It might look crooked or strange, or be very odd-but if it delights you, then it is yours, and will find it's way into other hearts.

And if you'd like some incredible online support for your writing creations, I'm so glad to let you know about my new eprogram called Juicy Journaling with SARK: A Nourishing Adventure to Start Your Day off WRITE. http://www.planetsark.com/JuicyJournaling.htm

The Wonder of this Boy

My spiritual godchild Jonah is a wonder.

 

Here we are in Jonah's living room, with him teaching me how to spar.

 

 

 

 

I'm wearing his helmet and gloves;-)

 

His parents Val & Clark teach him about energy, transformation and the power of manifesting.

 

The other day Val told me that she was late while driving, and needed a parking

space. So she asked Jonah to help manifest it. He said "Sure, Mom." She looked in her rear view mirror to find him in a meditative posture in his car seat. They then found a parking space. She then looked in the mirror to see him meditating again, and she asked what he was doing. And he replied; "I'm manifesting a space for someone else."

Ministers of Love

 

 

Being "Ministers of Love"

I'm noticing more and more how many opportunities there are to give and receive love, especially to "strangers." I don't really believe in strangers- I live in a world of everyone being a friend I just haven't met yet.

 

People often think I'm unusual for being "so familiar," and yet they also like it. We all have an opportunity to be what I call a "Minister of Love." This isn't religious as much as spiritual. The dictionary says that a minister "attends to the wants and needs of others."

 

Recently while waiting at an airport for my flight to depart, I kept track of some of my opportunities to share love:

*A woman traveling to Rome who was desperate for dental floss- I had some

*A crabby man who admitted his back hurt and asked if anyone had aspirin- I had some

*A flight attendant who finally smiled when I thanked her for doing her work so beautifully

*An exhausted parent who appreciated me sitting next to her baby on a chair, so it wouldn't roll off while

she dug in her diaper bag

*A nervous woman traveling with her cat in a carrier, and crying because her cat was crying. I offered to do some interspecies telepathic communication with her cat, and she told me it didn't cry again on the flight

We can each be on the lookout for more opportunities to care for each other. So many people are already doing this, and I'm gratefull every time I'm the recipent of a kindness or offering of love. Every time we extend ourselves in these ways, there is a shift in the world's energy. Let's share our love as true "Ministers of Love." Share your thoughts or stories with me here- I will read them.

 

Love, Susan (aka SARK)

Comments

[Painted Maypole]

I agree. We lived in NOLA during Katrina. There was a girl donw the street from us the same asge as my daughtet named Katrina. People would say "what an unfortunate name." But it wasn't. It was a beautiful name. It's unfortunate someone gave it to a hurricane.

Sharks are my favorite animal, but I do think that Hurricane Hammerhead and Hurricane Great White have a nice ring to them.

I've heard that the hurricanes were originally female names becuase htey were named after the Meteorologists' ex girlfriends.

[Alli Brook]

I completely agree with this! Including the 'Lazy Susan' term - never liked it! Bravo for this journal entry - where's the petition so I can sign? :)

[Diana]

Yes, what a fabulous idea! And I thought we were making headway when it was decided to begin using male names when naming hurricanes....BTW....why don't they name tornadoes? Or earthquakes? Or tsunamis????? Is it just an East Coast idiosyncracy?

So....my vote is to refer to ANYTHING devastating by a "pet name" - why attached horrible weather/earth happenings to innocent fish? So..Sugarpie....Honeybunch...(did you start dancing?)....Punkin....

At least we'd have to smile a bit in the midst of the threats and shake-ups....and maybe hold somebody's hand through it.

Regarding Lazy Susan.....well....maybe we should just use a name other than a person's name? I like revolving server. :-)

[Wendy Fedan]

What a great idea. I vote for Hurricane Pufferfish. I also love the idea of -- Hurricane Guppy, or something equally nonsensical like Hurricane Tupperware or Hurricane Mushroom. The possibilities are endless. Maybe naming them after cities/towns - Hurricane Cleveland, Hurricane Akron, Hurricane Monroe...

[Corey]

Hurricane:
Angler
Bass
Catfish
Damselfish
Eel
Flounder
Guppie
...

[Kourtney]

WONDERFUL! This entry made my heart swell with joy. Every young person should know how much they are loved.

[SarahWT]

Aw, that dear kiddo - seven petals destined for love are lucky indeed! :) This is a wonderful idea you had. I have some special kids in my life who would get a kick out of it, too.

[suzy lowinger]

beloved sark...i am so grateful for who and what you are that i am writing to say thank you for being you. i am 71 and moved to florida from manhattan 7 weeks ago. i have been long a fan of yours and the book that has survived my many moves is inspiration sandwich. those first few weeks here would have been too hard had it not been for that marvelous, indeed inspirational feeding. i did as you suggested and just opened it randomly. and it just got me through, a zillion thanks, that book was before computers:) suzy lowinger

[Debra]

As a mom and school teacher of little ones I just love this!

Thank you.

P.S. I have been a fan of yours for years.

Debra : )

[Amy Martin]

Sark,

I just watched a video of you for the first time and I am deeelighted. I feel like we just met, and I am all giddy.

Years ago I found your books which sparked my creativity, and now as a blogger myself (I tame The Blog Beast when he allows me), I am returning to a connection with you.

Saweeet.

Sending you imaginary multi-colored sprinkles!

Warmth,
Amy Martin

[Kim Bauer]

Hi,
I recently received a “Versatile Blogger Award. Part of the fun is paying it forward to 15 other bloggers that I admire. I selected your blog because over the last year, since I launched my site and jumped feet first into blogging, I have often read your posts and found your site inspirational. I realize this is not a “huge industry award” but bloggers give a lot and often receive very little recognition. I thought you might appreciate some kudos.
You can stop by my site by clicking on this link. If you decide you want to pay it forward, please do. If not, just know that there are many people out there who love what you do!
http://www.confabulicious.com/the-verdict-is-in-i-am-clueless-and-versatile/
All the Best!
Kim Bauer
www.confabulicious.com

[Kelly]

Radiant Susan,

This post really hits home for me! I have such difficulty with this, that I wouldn't even know what to ask for! Dream Boogie got me thinking about support and gave me wonderful tools to help me expand in that area, and I'm still working on it. I TOTALLY keep score in my head, and often feel as though I "owe" someone for a favor, though I'm getting better. On the flip side, I love it when people allow me to help them- it always makes me feel good, and I certainly don't want them to feel obligated to reciprocate. "Ask more and more, don't keep score." I'm posting it near my computer right now- thanks!

[Kate]

This was so timely for me to read. My teenage daughter has Down Syndrome. She was also born with a major cardiac abnormality and required heart surgery as an infant. She has experienced so many health and development challenges throughout her life but she is a tough little cookie whom we all admire. Just this week, our little lady has experienced seizures and it looks like the onset of Epilepsy. I has really distressed me, not actually managing the condition, but the fact that it seems so unfair for her to have yet another challenge to face. I love your comment re dancing with difficulties and celebrating gorgeous moments. I am not good at asking for help, but last night when I was feeling pretty distressed, I did reach out to some of my closest friends and received such a warm outpouring of love. Thank you SARK. Your positivity and warmth has really touched me especially today xox

[Kristi]

Hi SARK -
I'm a nurse and recently my husband is dealing with a few health issues. This is a first for him since we have been together. So as the nurse in me kicks into gear, my husband's macho dependence pushes me away. It is quite hard for some people to accept help, especially those that are very stoic. I keep on trying to chip away at my husband's refusal for help, it's working, but a very slow process. I think that we all know of friends and family that are going through tough times, I think that it is important for us to keep asking if they need anything and showing that we really are here for them. I guess this is asking more & more from the other side.....but just as important. Thanks for your post, it came for my husband & I at the right time!

[Satia]

Sark,

I finished Glad No Matter What and enjoyed it very much. I called your inspiration line, something I think I've only done twice before, and I hung up without leaving a message. Now I wish I had shared with you that I had to stop wearing my engagement ring because the diamond was coming loose. My husband wants to get it fixed. In the meantime, however, I'm wearing a ring which says "Allow Miracles" and has stars on it. I gave this ring to several people in my life one year including my daughter and my mother.

So today, I hope you are enjoying yourself wherever you are and I know you are allowing those miracles. As am I.

[Eleanor]

Thanks for this great post, SARK. This holiday, I decided it did not make sense to travel out west (from New York to see family. Travel this time of year is so stressful and expensive. Decided it was time to start some holiday traditions with my husband and neighbors. It was great having the quiet time to enjoy each other and the awesome place that New York is. Also, our apartment took on a magical quality!

[renee]

Well, I didn't find your site and this BLOG until today..
I heard you this morning on a Twin Cities radio show "Get Real Girls"
Which led me to your Facebook page..
which leads me to this ..only a week past the Holiday..
but the part of about NOT acting as if I am feeling something I am not--to feel what I am..yet find the joy-or Glad in the middle and stand on it..that helps..I choose to hang on to that..
loved our phone message also and am digging in to what other treasures I can find today..
thanks for the light

[William DeFoore]

Hi Sark

Thanks for your wonderful blog! I just wanted you to know that I put two links to your blog and quoted you in my most recent Goodfinding Newsletter (linked in this comment). Thanks again for contributing to the light, love and laughter in this magnificent world.

My best to you,

William

[Phyllis Johnson]

Loved Living Juicy! I was cleaning my office tonight and found the copy. My Muse has been absent lately and this will help.

[~julie~]

sark, on these holidays and always, i am very very glad for YOU.

i hope you are finding joy and love and happiness in whatever holiday(s) you choose to celebrate.

[Kristin Morrison]

Thanks Sark for this. Such a good reminder.

My business cranks up a notch this time of year which sometimes makes the holidays even more stressful. Though I'm grateful for financial abundance I've found myself depleted.

My body relaxed when I read your wise words and none too soon!

I will ask for help. I will rest. I will breathe.

And thus, I will enjoy the holidays.
:)

Warmly and gratefully,
Kristin

[Hazey_Sunshine]

This is brilliant advice, and exactly what I needed to hear reiterated. :)
<3

[Christie Wolf]

Oooops! I misstyped my URL

[Zann Carter]

I linked above with my FB page, where my status currently reads:

"Ah, nothing like a night with a puking child to make one supremely grateful for washing machines and a husband who will get up in the night and help. Thank you Maytag, thank you Paul!"
I was definitely playing GLAD games the previous night with my granddaughter.
Zann

[Christie Wolf]

I had so much fun joining in this highly creative and inspiring game! I was procrastinating, as usual, but as I'm in Hawaii it's still before midnight here, so I did make the December 10th deadline, I hope? :)

[Krysia]

Hello from Australia SARK. Hope I am not too late!!! And I am entered twice ??!!**@@?? ...so not technical :)

Thank you Susan for this opportunity to write about 'Glad' especially after spending time with you on my 'Scoop with SARK' two days ago. I have already benefited from your intuitive answer to my one question.
I am GLAD about you x

With Love and Gratitude xx Krysia xx

[soozie]

hurt is a fabric ... hold it gently & weave of it a cradle for your heart, a blanket full of dreams & a galaxy of stars for your soul ... magic, will & love : that is all it takes :-)
nice to be here on a friday night !!

[Monica Twa]

This is the beginning of a collection of wellness articles I am writing for my church's bulletin. It took for me to reach down into my reserve of self-confidence to start putting myself out there - even if it is to just my church's parishioners. Getting a hold of my self-confidence is something I am working hard on and plan to keep on doing into 2011. I want to continue to spread the message of wellness and fitness to my church members and to my community. I will be starting a blog with my writings very soon.

May you all pursue and find your true selves in 2011!

[Joanna]

Thank you for this inspiring little exercise. It looks like I found it just in the nick of time to enter, too!

[Tiffanie]

wow! I feel like i was synchronistically led to join in this fun! i "just happened" to create some art that said, "feeling doubt? choose JOY anyway!" Months earlier, I had been inspired by your blog post entitled, "Doing More Things Badly", so I wanted to link to it as I shared my art on my blog. and then i found THIS! how amazing!

yay!

[NaNa]

Love your writing style!
And would love to win the book!
I hope I can join even if I live in Europe...
I posted about my challenge on my blog.
Thank you!
Nathalie

[elle g horovitz]

what a great story. Can't wait to go out and find my next miracle and a cop to areeat my inner critic ... here's to releasing those demons.

[Therese Pope]

I had some tech difficulty the last time I left a comment. Hopefully, it works this time around. I shared my Miracle Walk experience on my business Facebook page. Sometimes we need to literally take time out of our busy day to stop and smell the roses - or in my case, enjoy a nature walk and snap shots of the beautiful Fall colors. :)Thank you SARK for the amazing gifts you share with us all - have loved your past teleseminars and your books truly inspire my creative whimsy and as a copywriter my creative whimsy can get tired. Happy Holiday Season to you all!

[ilene]

how do i get a url address? would like to participate but only have email addresses. <3

[Wendy Fedan]

What a wonderful contest! By the way, I met a new friend today - I can't wait to post about it -- I finally "Invited someone dangerous to tea!" Well, this person isn't exactly dangerous, but inviting any near-stranger to come to my house for tea is dangerous in my book :)
I bought this woman's Christmas tree - linked with her while searching for a new tree on Craigslist (my 3-year-old BROKE our tree last year!). She and I ended up having QUITE a lot in common! It was a miraculous meeting!

[Jennie]

SARK, I put my post up today (with a little help from my husband, who took the picture of me with your book). It may be hard to see the "glad" in being an underemployed writer/graphic artist, but your works give me hope. You are one of the wisdom brokers who show me possibilities. Thank you!

[Miki Markovich]

You are a true inspiration, making the world a better place one reader and interaction at a time. Your bravery shines through in your transparency. Thank you so much for the beauty you bring to the world, for the radical self-acceptance you applaud, and for the challenge of speaking openly of transforming what hurts into something that helps. I know that my life is richer because you're in it. Best wishes always.

[Lani]

I tried to leave a comment here but it went missing. Help!

[Cindy]

Good Morning Sark,I love to jumpstart my day with a dose of your wisdom, humor, sensibility and genuine awesomeness. Love your books. Spent my Summer vacation with two new ones. Never stop doing what you do!

[Julie]

I love the magical wondrous adventure of your books and ideas! I am currently on a miracle walk of life - I asked the Universe to send me job options just over 1 year ago and I was gifted the opportunity to explore three jobs that miraculously presented to me - each represented some version of what I'd considered the "perfect job" at some point in the past couple of years! The entire journey of exploring the lucky winner of my affections forced me out of my comfort zone and into fears I didn't realize were inside of me. I am currently working on transitioning from a fear space toward seeing my current journey as the miraculous most excellent adventure of transforming my current work into a magical creation and outlet of my joy and professional service. I am so grateful for being reminded through your work and book that we need to seek and acknowledge the miracles we enjoy in our lives. Thank you for being the creative model of how to honor the miracles that come when we call out to them!

Julie

[Lani]

Lovely post! I'm going to give my inner critic (and I thought having one was bad) a bad vacation in a poky resort somewhere with lots of stuff to be critical about.

I blogged about the wonderful games. So much fun. I will try the first one every day! Hooray!

[Sue Walker]

Having been made redundant at the end of August, I have been looking for a new job (and getting nowhere so far), and also been starting to cultivate a new(ish) creative dream, connected to art and gardening.
When the going has got tough, you have been there Sark, with free recordings, full of gentle laughter and giggles, and a dip into any of your books raises my spirit so I have renewed courage to persevere.
Thank-you so much! I wish I lived in the USA so I could come to one of your workshops - I live in England. I visited San Francisco in 1983, and fell in love with the place, so I find it easy to picture you there. Lots of love, Sue xx

[becky]

I have read SARK's most excellent book and had already blogged today before I checked in here and the focus on my entry happened to encompass transforming what hurts into what helps, or turning sad into glad. I was not only recently more motivated by SARK's book but find I must live in that space for life's Magic to happen. It isn't always easy, and we have to be responsible not to slip into Denial but if we shut ourselves to Magic and Miracles during times of pain: pain wins. Love. Peace. Magic. Hope.

[Kim Bauer]

Miracle walking, practical gladness, Amazing grace in the Gosh darned DMV. Wish I had been there for that one. Would have been life changing like your last book. Loved it.

Will love this one too I am sure.

Kim Bauer
www.confabulicious.com

[Nicole]

Learning to love me,
that's my biggest challenge right now.
Thanks so much for challenging us all to look at things in a different way. Finding things to be thankful for in a seemingly hopeless situation. There is hope, there is love, there is peace, there is joy.
Thank you.

[Lori]

I have always loved what you share about loss in our lives. That in transformation & even in death there are gifts to be found. You called them G.O.D. or Gifts of Death. I always look for them now. I am grateful for them. And grateful your your friendship.

[Lynette Gourde]

It has been 5 months since I volunteered to be part of a reduction in force in my department. I had found my dream job of helping people grow personally and professionally for almost 10 years. I had the chance to stay, but I chose to go in order to save a co-worker from being part of the RIF. I didn't want her to know I had taken her place.
I struggle with my decision, because of the impact it has had financially on my family (I still haven't found a job). And yet, I also remind myself of the good that has come from this difficult decision...I was able to spend the entire summer with my 8 and 5 yr old. I can see life through their eyes and not rush from one place to the other...I can stop and play with them after school and take time to enjoy without being rushed. The warm fuzzies, hugs and kisses I receive from them transforms the hurt into happy.

[Tiffanie]

ahh!
what a relief!!
thanks for the inspiration. : )

[Elizabeth]

SARK! That's what Samuel Beckett said too! “Go on failing. Go on. Only next time, try to fail better.” -- Samuel Beckett OH, boy, did HE ever do things differently than everyone else! Thanks! I am ALWAYS worrying about what others think! And I feel frozen half the time. Except in savasana. If only I could WRITE in savasana! XOXO

[Teralyn]

You have such great ideas! I'm struggling with a book I'm writing right now -- it's a romance, and I NEVER write romances. I have to be so incredible vulnerable, and since I've never done it before, it's uncomfortable for me. I should stop taking myself so seriously. Maybe I could just write something bad, laugh at it, keep it, and not live in fear that someone's going to pick up my notebook and start giggling at it... or if they do, maybe I could giggle along with them. It's hard, but I need to stop being scared.

[Jenn]

I *must* learn this lesson! It's one of the main things I struggle with as a writer...the feeling that it's got to be perfect the first time 'round!

Jenn
www.momentary.org
what are you grateful for today?

[Denise Michaels]

I love this journal entry. Because so many women have a tendency to be "pleasers" we want so much for things to be "right" before stepping forward and really taking a risk. The challenge is that if it has to be perfect first - so many times we hold back.

I've been a mentor to women business owners for many years and I can't even tell you how many times a woman will spend months or years researching a business idea and then a man who doesn't know as much as her jumps out with an idea very close. We don't get brownie points in heaven for researching and holding back.

Denise Michaels Excellent Adventure
http://www.DeniseMichaels.com

[Delphine]

Yippety, YAHOO!!! I love this...I feel better already. Tonight I plan to get the "badly" going as soon as I get home. Can't wait to see the kids and my husband's reaction...oh what fun! Sark, your the bestest!

[Emily]

I have bookmarked this post so I can return and read it often! What simple, life altering advice! As the oldest I was always the good, reliable one. Trying to be perfect, and never saying no has been a constant struggle.

[Eden]

Love it, wise words once again SARK.
Thank you :)

[Joodie]

What are some of the things you practice and do "...when I feel less than self-loving or caring"??
I just lost my dad and am having lots of days like that.

[Emma]

oh, you last wrote on my birthday! maybe you can write again for those of us wandering about in internetlandia?

[Kelley]

"...joy is everlasting, and pain can't always be trusted."

Thank you for this! Indeed, enjoy the day!

[jen gray]

xo

[TERI REES WANG]

Funny you say that, I just sat through a Youtube video called "Suck it!"..for writers, to learn to suck, a lot, and if you think you suck, you probably don't suck enough.
Don't be afraid to suck! ;P

"Dare to Suck": http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Nyhv80HDSj4

[KellieS]

Hi,

I appreciate your insight on the self-care topic. So many drown themselves in the affairs of others, forgetting to seek refuge and spirit connection. It always ends up the same way....burn out city! Well, thanks for the post. I just found you, so I'll be back.

Kellie

[Karen L. Valentine]

SARK, I love how you received your pen name. Your web site is so inspiring, thank you. I received the book you have written, Juicy Pens Thirsty Paper for Christmas this year from my son and daughter-in-law. I needed a boost to get back into writing and this is it. I am having so much fun thinking of new ideas or using the old ideas I have that have been just sitting there ready to awaken. Thank you and I send my love back to you.
Peace, Love Karen

[Laura Hegfield]

Such a delightful comment from little Jonah...a wise and generous soul! I remember coming upon my girls meditating at times when they were small...and the remarkable things they would say. My favorite story was my older daughter (probably 6 or so) explaining to her little sister (that puts her around 3), about how life here on earth is like a play. God puts different clothes on our souls so we can be a certain person and then when we are done being that person God changes our clothes so we can be someone else. She was expressing her 6 year old view on reincarnation from her car seat to her toddler sister! I never told her these things...it was her understanding of the journey of a soul...kids are amazing!

[Carol]

You are indeed an enlightened woman ~ Do so enjoy your work ~ Happy Holidays ` Carol

[Terry]

I've been a fan since I worked at a bookstore in Glendale, Az in '78-'79. Reconnected every time I found one of your books or your newer books when I worked in a bookstore in the 90's. I cannot thank you enough for the encouragement you have provided so many through the years. Your vibrant energy spreads through every dogma religion and spiritual journey around the world. I am continually finding myself on the short end of believing in who I am and what God sees in me. Letting others tell me who I am when they cannot accept me as I am has been a lifelong dilema for me. Through open-minded people like you, I continue to have an positive outlook about today. Trials in our lives can bring us to the point of no return, but the light of hope can keep us looking forward with the power of believing in today and tomorrow. Thank you for sharing your life with others. May you continue to be blessed for your continued optimism and joy. We, your fans, will continue to believe in the power of one to bring a smile and dry a tear. God Bless

[Monisha Mittal]

SARK
For some reason, the book at the upper right hand corner caught my eye. I would like to know what book it is, if its at all possible for you to find a chance to reply.
This is my first time writing on your website so I did also want to thank you, for the ability to unlock my heart each time. I am very happy to read your blog posts and looking to commit to the Juicy Journaling offering. THANK YOU FOR YOUR LOVE.

By the way, in case its not clear, this comment is in response to your Dancing with Difficulties audio post. Thanks, much love, Monisha

[TERI REES WANG]

I need this reminder again Today!

Thanks...in every way.

Be well.
Do good.
All ways.
All days.
Stay true.

[Kari]

This post really spoke to me Susan. I am most definitely my own best friend, and some days I fear my only friend. I do have other friends, but quite honestly the ones who know me best I've never even met in real life.

Either way, I feel I'm of no value to anybody else unless I am happy with and taking good care of myself. It really effects the energy a person gives off I think!

I would like to thank you for your kindness with the Juicy Journaling program. It is just what I need and I'm so happy I stumbled across your work when I did! You inspire me daily and I'm grateful for that!

[WildeWoman]

I am so excited - hoping to be able to sign up for Juicy Journaling this week! I have put my foot down and I am finally committing to delighting myself first! :)

[maria browne]

Your wonderful, inspirational world of color and joy has been my companion since your first book. I used to call the inspiration hotline while I was babysitting to pay my way through UC Berkeley. Now I live in Ireland and often re-read your books during the long grey winters to light up my dark nights and remember to not only see the beauty in the obvious but to keep looking even when it doesn't seem to be there so thanks for many years of good times spent together (in spirit at least). I'm shooting you with positive vibes from accross the planet.

[Journey]

What a wonderful post. Thanks for sharing this story of this wonderful child.

[McNair]

Stop beating up my friend, Jonah!

[Rose-Ann]

I am attending Juicy Pens, Thirsty Paper at Kripalu next week and am very excited! Can I buy the book there? I just read Succulent Wild Woman again and responded to the questions - so helpful and uplifting. I am looking forward to meeting you!

[liz elayne]

manifesting a space for someone else.
the wisdom of a beautiful child.
as i read this all i can think is that this is one of those things that life is all about. manifesting space for ourselves, for one another. i often think about creating space and holding the space for someone else when we listen to someone tell their story. this image of manifesting the space deeply speaks to me.
yes. love this. thank you for sharing this story.

[Peggy]

How timely that I read this just now! Last week my friend and I took a two-day jaunt together, and she felt compelled to tell me that my "friendliness" to other people frightened her because she's afraid that some stranger will harm us. This is my best friend, and I respect her feelings, but I felt resentful that she expected me to restrain my interactions with strangers. I speak to everyone as if I've known them all my life; I feel that everyone yearns for acknowledgment. For the rest of our trip, I felt subdued and unnatural.

[Kathryn - Collage Diva]

This is just too precious. Your sweet & wise Jonah reminds me of my own son. I taught my son how to meditate when he was five and now that he is 13, I can see how he uses breathing to keep his calm during stressful situations.

Enjoy Jonah and his parents.
{soul hugs}
Kathryn, Collage Diva

[Wendy Fedan]

What a nice kid! Love that story about the parking space... and I love that photo, too! :) Wild Warrior!

[Jes]

Dear SARK,

1. You have the most BEAUTIFUL voice. It's so comforting and warm and friendly, I feel like I've known you forever.

2. When I travelled in Guatemala, I met a cab driver named Carlos. He was one of those cab driver angels you speak of. He and I instantly clicked and for the first time in 3 months I spoke Spanish without hesitation. Weeks later he saw me on the street and greeted me with hugs and kisses and inquiries about me. I never felt so loved by a "stranger".

3. Dancing with Difficulties... oh boy! I am! I said to my sister earlier today "I LOVE making mistakes, I am learning from them, LET ME make them!!!"

Much love!

[Anil Urmil]

"I don't really believe in strangers- I live in a world of everyone being a friend I just haven't met yet."

Dear Sark,

What an optimistic attitude! I love it. Your words of wisdom enrich, educate, entertain and enlighten me. Thanks for being yourself.

Namaste and Love, Anil

[Sunny]

This resonated with me so clearly.

I have recently accepted "kindness" as one of my purposes for this life. Now when I have to do something in my job that is scary for me - - like walking into a new office half way across the country and meeting new people that I will be training, I just keep thinking that training is my second job here. My first is to be a "light" and to offer kindness to everyone.

[Kerridwen Niner]

Good morning, i came to visit today having stopped by Michelle of Enchanted Inspirations. Her latest post being about your post and your books. It's very interesting what you say and i could instantly think of two occasions yesterday where i was maybe a 'Minister of Love'. One of my hairdressing clients daughter is expecting twins, her first. She is currently in hospital following a bleed, they are keeping an eye on her but not following through with anything they say. I can speak very loudly from experience about how a bad experience with labour and all that followed so you can imagine i kinda jumped on the bandwaggon a bit. Anway i said when you see her 'Give her a big hug from me and tell her to take no 'insert polite alternative for rubbish lol from anyone' and said i would call her mum in the next couple of weeks so see how things were going. I saw a glimmer of something come over her mums face, surprise maybe but i've been there and have been invited into the lives of the family many times over the years i've been doing mums hair including on the expectant mums wedding day so yeah 'i care' :-)

[Michelle Perkett]

Dear Sark,

I am so grateful to you for sharing such wonderful words always. I am grateful for your books I have at home that I look thru always. You inspire me to tears!

I am also on a mission to spread kindness and love, I feel it is so important for all of us to do so. I make it a point to smile at everyone and especially people who need it everyday.

I smiled and thanked the woman at Subway who never smiles and she smiled back at me. I plan on spreading my smile everywhere!

Thank you for inspiring me!

Michelle :)

[sheri lee taylor]

hi sark...quick quick note Happy birthday happy birthday you sweetheart! we love you!
from sherilee ,izabella and jasmine......hey do you see us? have you seen us.....? the pictures i mean the pictures! ( :

[Cindy]

There are soooooooo many opportunities for us to be Love Ministers. I really like that you're talking about this. I have long held a belief that talking about Love in it's purest of forms does more for the transformation of this planet than we can ever imagine.

And, isn't it just delightful to have these kinds of experiences in our lives -- the giving and receiving parts!

I'm participating in your Transformation Experience, and one of the things I'm exploring is my challenging brother relationship. This morning, my Sister sent me one of the most beautiful reminders about how amazing we are as humans, and it made this whole brother challenge reach such an attainable perspective. Her little ministry of love has melted away some HUGE obstacles, and opened the door for change.

She has no idea that I'm participating or 'working' on this little challenge in my life. Yet, her generous sharing has been a ministry of Love she will never ever fully understand. The very best kind of gift -- I dare say.

Thank you, dear soul, for being who you are and inviting us to continue to explore ourselves!

[Tapati]

I always try to be especially kind to anyone in customer service jobs because I know how often they get negative comments or downright rude behavior. I'm always praising them and urging them to have a great day, saying thank you, etc.

Once I read about a woman who had been very active in our local fat acceptance community. She made the papers when she participated in the protest against the miss california pageant that used to be held there. There was an article about how her health had deteriorated and she was housebound and had broken her ankle, so she couldn't get around and couldn't cook for herself. I was also home recuperating and cooking a heart healthy diet for myself, so I contacted the reporter, got her number, and started bringing her food for the week in containers. I also loaned her movies and books. I loaned her 2 of my SARK books, in fact!

A few months later she passed away and no one knew whose books and movies they were so I never got them back, but I like to think that they provided solace and inspiration during the last months of her life.

When I was homeless years ago there were people who took me in and several times I have paid it forward and helped people out in the same way.

Also, when I was a single parent there were people who were kind to me and I try to help out any single parent I know, especially with practical things like doing some housework or cooking or just giving them encouragement. To be a single parent is often to be exhausted and feeling like the weight of the world is on your shoulders. A kind word or a bit of help can give you new energy to go on.

I have given food and money to homeless people because I never forget where I came from. One day a woman was coughing and coughing and sounded terrible. I didn't have any money but I had some cough drops (Ricola) in my purse and dug down deep to find them for her. She was so happy! It's the tiniest gestures sometimes that mean so much. One doesn't have to be wealthy to give!

Now that I am home much of the time, dealing with chronic illness, I am often frustrated that I can't give more. But I read a number of blogs and friend's journals and any time someone is hurting or needs a kind word, I know that is something I can give.

I believe everything we do comes back to us, kind or cruel. How much better to cast kindness out on the waves?

Blessed Be

[marguerite]

Hi Sark
I went to post in the guestbook, and it brought me here instead, where I got to read this amazing minister of love blog you wrote. I love it so much.
Here are a couple minister of love things i like to do:
I pack sack lunches with stuff like peanut butter crackers and granola bars. I always keep a few in my car to give to homeless people when i am out in about. I put a note in each bag that says: You are loved. And when I give it to them, I smile and look into their eyes. I try to do the smile-eye thing to anyone, not just homeless people. It says: you are seen and loved regardless of your circumstances.
i just listened to the recording about intimacy and loved that so much too! I am vibrating with excitement for the conference call in 45 minutes!
Thank you for doing all of this. My life is already transforming. I had the most amazing day yesterday!
Here's my blog about it:
A Mother's Love (photo not included)
The big kid in the center with his arms crossed is Chaska. (pronounced Cha-skay) Three years ago, I dated his father. I had never been with a guy who had a kid he saw on a regular basis, so it was very foreign territory for me. I didn't take well to it at first. But, fortunately for me, he's a very mature and forgiving kid. He gave me many chances to redeem myself. Eventually I grew to love him. Eventually he grew to call me mom. I never had kids of my own, and I never knew until then how good it could feel to hear a kid call you that: "mom." Chaska's real mother is addicted to speed and living on the streets, so he never sees her. He's been through a lot, and he's a shy, sad and quiet kid. He is being raised by his grandparents. It turned out his dad was an alcoholic to an extent that I have never witnessed in any human being before or since. We, of course, eventually had to part ways. I continued to see Chaska for months afterward though. I went to every one of his basketball games, and tutored him twice a week because he was failing 6th grade. Eventually I had to back away. It was becomming difficult and confusing for Chaska, because I couldn't be around his father and remain sane. But I never forgot the kid who called me mom, and I often wondered if he turned out alright.
Fast forward to yesterday. I was doing laundry, and up pulled a van containing a family of 5 and two adorable weiner dogs. As most of you kow,I have a weinr dog and will go up and talk to anyone else who has one. So that's what I did. I became fast friends with the whole family. The 15 year old boy, Andrew, took a special liking to me, and talked my ear off as I did my laundry. He was interesting, articulate and reminded me so much of Chaska. He even looks like him. I asked where he went to school and what grade he was in. He told me, and I asked "You wouldn't happen to know a kid named Chaska, would you?" Lo and behold: they are best friends....
I wrote Chaska a note of reconnection, to say I never forgot him, and Andrew is giving it to him today. I had just gotten a lovely care package from Kimmie, and I used the envelope from her card to put Chaska's note into. (Thanks again Kimmie! You are a part of this miraculous story!) My heart has cracked wide open. I didn't give him my number, because I didn't want to add confusion to his life. I also don't want to open a door for his very charming drunk of a father to walk back into my life.
I did give my card to Andrew's mother, Maria, though. If Chaska wants to reach me, she will let me know. We totally hit it off, Maria and I. I ended up telling her my life story there in the laundromat. I think we may become friends. Most of my close friends are far away: Sonya's in NH, Vanessa's in WA, Vida's in CO, and Nan is moving to OR in a month. I need a new friend. I hope that Maria will be that new friend....
And even though I shouldn't, I wish to hear Chaska call me "mom" again.
A mother's love, even if it's not blood, never dies.

[Mary Schweigert]

Susan,

YOU are my long lost soul sister and are an inspiration to all!!! I have read two of your books recently (given to me by my most succulent nanny) and have completely found my inner self again!

Too often we get carried away with our everyday responsibilities and forget what is REALLY important in life. It all starts within yourself, and YOU have given that power back to me!!!

Thank you for all you do for millions of people around the world!!! You have been that "Minister" to me!!!

Mary Schweigert

[Anna]

Hi SARK. Thanks so much for this! I was crying when i listened.

Currently I am struggling with finding a home. I'm renting a tiny little space from a single mom who is very stressed and often negative. I feel I have no space in which to relax and to regenerate and to be alone with myself. I don't really talk to her as she seems so harsh and I don't want to risk the negativity she might share w/ me.

I want my own home: a place where I can relax and from which I do not have to move unless I decide to. The city in which I live is very expensive, though. I've read many of your books and know about your "magic cottage", and how you bought it. Do you have some tips for me?

Thanks!

ps: would you be able to share a bit of insight into how one might manage to balance concerns over money w/ happiness? I want to live somewhere sunny...and am tempted to move to such a place even w/ o a job... but find myself being cautious. Thanks!

[Jennifer]

this reminds me...early friday night my daughter wanted a bagel so we swung into dunkin donuts and picked one up...i paid the worker and before we left i simply said "have a nice weekend." he looked at me, smiled and said "thank you." it was a very sincere exchange we had that made me smile too. i pointed out to my daughter the importance of just being nice and meaning it and she said " i know Mom" with a little smile.

[Johanna]

HI Sark! My name is Johanna. I just love to take care of others in the sense that I see them as brothers and sisters. When I find myself in a judgemental mood, I repeat "I am you" and it works every time no matter who it is I meet, I realize I've done what they do or been in the same mood or attitude they are experiencing at the moment.

I share in the area where I live:

*When I go for my groceries, I joke with all the cashiers and call them by their name (they love that)
*I like to think of ways to make my friends happy since I have the time for this cause I'm not working presently
*I always leave space for others to pass either on the street or at the mall and am constantly on the lookout for them
*Once I changed the mood of an old man who was sick at the hospital where I was waiting myself to be examined. He kept complaining and fussing and his two sons were trying to ignore him cause he acted kinna spoiled. I thought it would be a great opportunity to see if Reiki at a distance could work in this case and in a matter of a couple of minutes he started to smile, was in a great mood for no reason at all and became the most charming patient around!
*I use Reiki at a distance for anyone I know has a hard time or for anyone who might need it
*I have been stopped a few times by people who ask me why I smile all the time, to which question I am surprised cause I don't realize that I am smiling. I guess it helps me to help them

I don't know you very much, just read a few things on your site which is very lovely by the way, but I hear a lot of great things about you from others and that is why I wanted to receive your news letters.

Thank you very much Susan!

JOhanna

A big HUG to you!

[Wendy]

This reminds me a lot of Leo Buscaglia's philosophy. He sure was wonderful, wasn't he? I especially loved how he gave out hugs after his lectures. I watched this on television with my parents when I was younger.
Thank you for keeping this philosophy alive in your wonderful musings!